I am going to tell you about a feeling that I know everyone has had at one point or another.
A great yearning, that you have had and felt for a long time, but may not have acted on for one reason or another. It may be about start a diet, looking for a new job, moving away from an unhealthy relationship – whatever the case. I’m talking about something that you know you should do, but because of time, money, or not having the energy you put it off for what seems like (or is actually) years. Do you know where I’m coming from?
For me this started off at work. The day to day grind of working for an insurance company (right!?) really can suck all the passion right out of your soul. It reached the point where every day was exhausting, not because of the job, but because my heart was so removed from it that it was a chore. Everyone I work with is miserable, and the people whom are more successful than I are even more jaded.
It took me a long while to reach the point where I realized I was content is the day to day unhappiness. So I began looking outward to escape from it, I’m still in the works of finding something better, but that’s not the part I want you to take away from this.
Now, watch how fast a single moment inspired me.
I was driving through the Alcove Reservoir for my first time on the way to customers home, it was no particular day and for no special customer. When crossing the bridge, a smell tickled my nose. My window was down and I felt the stick of the humidity around me. I looked out over the fog coming down from the mountain, it hovered over the water of the reservoir and stuck out in my mind. Had I seen this before? Something very much like it actually. It was the cover to a book I had during a college for existentialism class. Suddenly I was back in that classroom, hearing a lecture that had stuck out in my mind. My professor had spoken to us about transcendence – a person being able to move themselves from a state of darkness and sorrow to one of bliss. This was a matter of perspective and realization, as if it was a conscious decision to be happy. Was it? Was I choosing to be unhappy, was I choosing for this job to consume me?
In that instant, I felt like I was. I was letting it bring me down and make me unhappy. But what else could I do – this is my career and I am very skilled at it. ‘Well, what would I do?’ I asked myself. I had always loved telling tales of mythical creatures, monsters and heroes, creating worlds that through story or a simple d&d session I could share and bring others into. Obviously that wouldn’t be overnight, I haven’t written since college and a novel with the depth of story I have already created wouldn’t be brief – but I will do it.
Inspired by the memory of old words from a droning lecture, brought on by the damp smell of fog rolling over the Alcove Reservoir, supported by my love and life Nikki in a world we dreamed together – I begin the first chapter of my new career on page 1 of Radiant Heroes. And I want to share this journey with you.
Everyone might have their own ‘insurance company’, and certainly we find our own excuses (or reasons) why we can’t take that first step to chase that dream. And that’s fine.
But one day if your lucky, the smell of that fog will catch your nose.
And it will be your arm in moisture of that humidity.
It will take you back to a day you learned something that was meant for you to use at this very instant.
And it will change your life forever.